As far back as memory takes me, I’ve always been an introvert. Now twenty three years later, I don’t think I am one. I’m shy, but it fades away in time if I like the company. Many a time it doesn’t fade away though – and at such times I don’t bother correcting people who think it’s me and not them.
My mom is an extrovert – Charm incarnate. People, including myself, are drawn to her as moth is to flame. So I know the difference, you see, the impenetrable barrier between being the warm people’s person and the person I am. I’m the black sheep of the family. I’ve always been conscious of it; ever aware.
It’s only now, after living these many years that I’ve come to understand who I am. From within and as seen from afar. And I couldn’t be happier with my introspection.
However, it also makes me want to evaluate why I am who I am.
Why were books my best bet as a kid? Why can I not stand people to a larger extent than deemed normal? What factors contributed to my early maturity of mind, my ability to be happy by myself, my need for space and my wariness of people in general?
Why is my preference for quiet and solitude viewed as a quirk – why isn’t it normal? Why is it such a taboo to be anything other than what’s “right”? Why does society have certain standards – and anyone who doesn’t cut it mercilessly shadowed and ridiculed? Why can we not be who we are, instead of being washed over by tides and forced to wear masks?
What are we prepping and dressing up for .. If we are all gonna be stripped bare as we move on anyway?
What are we so scared of, humanity as a whole, toeing an invisible line, if the next lifetime is a fresh start bound only by karma?
Why do we care so much about everything that we need not care about?
PS: I’m aware that it’s tad too personal a piece. But I would like for it to be viewed as a general introspection of every shy or introverted (pardon the language) person.
Disclaimer: People I interact with on a personal basis please don’t get bummed. It’s not you, it’s me;)
PPS: Featured image is from ‘An introvert’s advice’ on Tumblr, google images.